Coloratura Christian

Finally Blogging Again...Again

2009-11-15T20:31:00.001-08:00

You can find me over at Fortaste of Heaven.

Blessed Union

2006-08-02T07:10:00.000-07:00

Clint and I have decided to start a new blog called Blessed Union. Hopefully between the two of us we'll be able to keep the posts coming a little more regularly. You can find the fruit of our combined efforts here.

Those Crazy Composers

2006-07-21T08:25:00.000-07:00

I found out a few days ago that I passed my ARCT voice exam, so now I'm cramming to complete the history and theory components (I'm scheduled to write them on August 11 & 12.)

As I study the life and music of Romantic and 20th century composers, I am getting a little depressed because it seems that many of the genius composers are either somewhat crazy, totally crazy or even evil crazy.

Take for instance Richard Wagner (1813-1883). I LOVE his music, but the man was an arrogant jerk.

It seems he was always getting into trouble and having to flee the country. In 1839 he was forced to flee Riga, Russia to escape his creditors. Apparently, he and his actress wife liked to spend exorbitant amounts of money. He later had to flee Germany because there was a warrant out for his arrest (because of his involvement in a revolt in 1849.)

He had affairs with two different married women. The first one was the wife of a very generous patron, and when she wouldn't leave her husband, Wagner was supposedly inspired to write Tristan and Isolde, a story about a knight in love with married lady Isolde.

Fortunately for Wagner, the king of Bavaria, Ludwig II, was an admirer. He settled Wagner's debts and assisted him in getting his opera produced in Munich. The crazy man then had an affair with Cosima, Franz Liszt's illegitimate daughter whose husband was a great Wagner admirer and actually conducted the premiere of Tristan and Isolde. The indiscretion of his second affair caused him to fall out of favor with the court, and again he was forced to flee the country for Switzerland.

The worst offence was that he called himself a Christian, but it sounds like he believed a sort of Gnostic, Buddhist, Aryanist "Christianity", obviously some invention of his own, an amalgamation of the beliefs of his day.

Although his name is often connected with Adolf Hitler, it is impossible that they could have met because Wagner died before Hitler was born. I have read that Hitler was a fan of Wagner's music, but I have also read that Wagner's last opera, Parsifal, was banned in Nazi Germany because it was too pacifist.

Even though Wagner was an evil genius, he was a genius. Apparently he was mostly self taught, and had only about six months of formal training in theory. Even those who hate Wagner (and he did have many enemies even in his own day) have to admit that his music is incredible and powerful.

After researching his life, it somewhat ruined my enjoyment of his music. Although, it does console me to think that he is not benefiting from record sales.

The "Elder Brother Syndrome"

2006-07-07T07:23:00.000-07:00

I have often heard it said that God would be totally just in sending every person to hell.

I totally agree with this statement. However, if I'm being honest, it does nothing to stir my heart in praise. It does cause my heart to fear, though, especially if I dwell on this thought for any length of time. And how can you dwell on this fact for long without also dwelling on the fact that God is merciful, compassionate and loving. Both justice and mercy are intrinsical to Him. Even though God would be totally just in sending every person to hell, because of His mercy, many are saved.

Unbelievers also have some understanding of God's justness (as evidenced by their conscience), and His kindness (as evidenced in loving relationships, the beauty of creation, and every other good thing on earth that they enjoy.)

This leads me to ask the question, "How is the believer's understanding of God fundamentally different from an unbeliever's understanding of God?" While I'm sure the answer is not one dimensional, the answer that presses foremost on my mind is that a believer is intimately acquainted with God's love and mercy, and therefore finds comfort in the fact that God is just and will not go back on His word.

An unbeliever cannot possibly believe that God is merciful and loving and still remain His enemy. Perhaps they would say that God's love is fickle and whimsical, if there at all. Therefore, He is not truly just, and his judgment is something to be greatly feared (or vigilantly ignored).

Even though I have known God's intimate love, there are times that I am tempted to think of Him as a cold, distant judge; even an unjust judge. You know those times when you say, "Father, I have tried to live faithfully, and to serve you as best I can. Why have you withheld ____ from me?"

I have recently heard an excellent sermon by Sinclair Ferguson entitled Christian Service: Slavery or Sonship. In it he talks about what he calls "the Elder Brother Syndrome." In Luke 15 after the prodigal son returns home and is received with joy by his father, the elder son says to his father (v. 29), "Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends."

Ferguson warns against the error of seeing God as a harsh task-master. Satan set out to "assassinate the character of God in the garden," and since then, the natural disposition of mankind believes that service to God is slavery. According to Ferguson, Christians are not totally immune to this lie. We can easily slip into thinking that God is unforgiving, unappeasable and unfair.

Ferguson says some of the manifestations of "the Elder Brother Syndrome" in the Christian life are self-righteousness, a critical and cynical view of others (which he says reflects our view of God), and a personal confinement which he describes as, "inability to have a heart that is opened to the reassurances of the Heavenly Father that we are accepted in his grace in Jesus Christ, and that he will supply all of our needs out of the riches of His grace."

I believe that God's justness and holiness cannot be divorced from His mercy and love in describing his character. It paints a picture of a cold and distant God as opposed to the passion and intimacy that is brought about in Jesus Christ.

Conversely, this intimacy cannot be appreciated without first understanding the great holiness of God. Far too often God's love is disgustingly cheapened in Christian circles because God is brought down to the level of a boyfriend or buddy. However, we cannot shy away from the truth that God is mercy. It is true that God would be totally just in sending everyone to hell. But He will not, because He is merciful.

Believers must cling to the fact that we are completely forgiven, and that God's wrath is completely appeased by the blood of Jesus Christ. We must not be overcome by false guilt, and never feeling 'good enough' to please God. As Ferguson says, "When we don't believe that we are fully and finally forgiven, we are easy prey for Satan's blackmail." We need to remember that God has indeed saved us, and cares intimately for us as a Father does his son or daughter, and that "he will supply all of our needs out of the riches of His grace." There is truly nothing that can separate us from the love of God.

And you were dead in the trespasses and sins ... and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ- by grace you have been saved- and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. (Ephesians 2)

Informed Conscience and OCP

2006-07-04T08:50:00.000-07:00

I went to see my doctor the other day in continuation of my research on whether the oral contraceptive (birth control) pill is abortive.

She confirmed that the second back-up method of the pill is abortive (although that is certainly not the term she would use to describe it.)

What I want to know is why it is so difficult to get this information. My experience is that doctors (generally speaking) do not explain fully what the pill does when prescribing it. Neither does the manufacturer (in the insert that comes with the pill for the general public), or the pharmacist (when despensing the pill,) explain what it does.

Despite whether this information leads someone to believe in good conscience that the pill is acceptable (because the chances of causing an abortion are slim enough), or unacceptable (because they are uncomfortable with the possibility of killing babies,) we should still be given all the information we need to make an informed decision.

Because this is a touchy subject, I want to be careful, but I would encourage Christians to take the time to research this issue for themselves (if applicable). Although ignorance can be bliss, I believe that Christians should strive to make responsible decisions, and this requires an informed conscience.

Wedding Celebration

2006-06-29T09:52:00.000-07:00

On the weekend we celebrated the marriage of my beautiful sister-in-law, Angel Humfrey, to Brad Toews. Congratulations you guys!

**Addition: Here's a picture from their actual wedding. ***

Where Lululemon meets John Deere

2006-06-12T15:18:00.000-07:00

Lately, I have been having fun comparing Torontonians in their 20's and 30's to Calgarians of the same age. Some of the things I observed are as follows (of course these are over-generalizations):

Rich Torontonians love to wear elite name brands such as Gucci, Prada, etc., and poor Torontonians often go vintage/hippy/artsy with all sorts of strange combinations of clothes gathered from rare and unique clothing boutiques. Rich Calgarians prefer to wear the Lululemon style clothing that says, "I paid this much money to try to look like I'm not trying too hard," with an occasional John Deere purse. Poorer Calgarians wear mainstream American brands and Lululemon knock-offs.

Black, beige, gray and white are the main color palate for Torontonians. You don't want to be different from anyone else (unless your a hippy/artsy type). Calgarians enjoy color, and the jet-setters are not afraid of over-the-top, straight-out-of-the magazine snazzy-ness.

Most of our 20/30 something friends in Toronto are single or married without kids. They rent an apartment suite and drive an older car that's good on gas. They often switch from job to job or take breaks for further education. Most of our 20/30 something friends in Calgary own their own home, have 1.5 kids, drive a car plus an SUV or new pick up truck, and hold a steady job.

In Toronto you never mention "the troops" unless it's in outrage over the war. In Calgary, people talk about joining the army and even pray for the troops.

Torontonians love sleek and chic hair. Brown shades are vogue. Calgarians enjoy hair with a little more height. Volume and curl are vogue and you'd be hard pressed to find a woman without blonde highlights.

Kids are the "greatest accessory" according to a Yorkville sign in Toronto. Kids are also the greatest accessory in Calgary...although you may see a few more baby Wranglers and chaps in the Calgary area.

In Calgary, there are no children allowed in the play park without an adult. In Toronto, there are no adults allowed in the play park without children. (Honestly, that's what the sign says!)

In Calgary, women wear dresses. In Toronto...well... you know.

Way of Life

2006-06-06T07:38:00.000-07:00

Moving is always difficult, but especially when you are changing, not just location, but also culture and your function in that culture.

How difficult it is when you have set up your own 'way of life', to then have to adjust to someone else's 'way of life.' When you have designed a life that is unique to you, that is centered around you and your own particular enjoyments and comfort, it is so difficult to suddenly lose it. Especially when your previous 'way of life' is actually a careful carving out of who you are or who you desire to be. All of the things you do and the people you surround yourself with begin to become your identity.

When life is good, it is easy to be a "good"person, or even a "good Christian." It is easy to have joy and to be thankful. Your sin seems so small because you rarely indulge it, you are too happy to bother with base emotions such as anger, jealousy and pettiness.

When you are living this way, you cannot truly say with Paul, "It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me." If you were honest, you would have to say, "It is I who live, and Christ lives to serve me."

God can do nothing kinder than to shatter this 'way of life,' because it is a life of self-idolatry. But oh how painful! It is amazing how many grotesque sins appear in your heart, and then you wonder, "How can I have become so base?" until you realize that you have always been this base, but you just flattered yourself otherwise.

Have mercy on me,O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me.
Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you may be justified in your words and blameless in your judgment.
Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.
Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being, and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart. Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice.

Back in Alberta

2006-05-28T19:13:00.000-07:00

Clint and I were more than happy to have our internet hooked up yesterday. We now feel connected to the world again!

We've been back for almost two weeks, and are slowly readjusting to this way of life. What a change from Toronto! Rather than sirens, we hear crickets. Rather than obscene yells echoing up from the alleyway, we hear the bulls bellowing from the fields. Best of all, the birds chirp here (as opposed to Toronto's birds that seem to almost groan.)

It still seems a little foreign to call myself a farmwife. I'm probably still more comfortable in my Toronto surroundings, but it is beautiful here.

Last night we enjoyed a wonderful time of fellowship with Dan and Marlene Sudfeld (aka Spudfiles and Home Maker). It was a refreshing time for us. It's always a treat to hang out with others who truly love the Lord.

This morning we worshipped with Blackie Community Bible Church. Pastor Todd Braye preached an excellent sermon on the nature of genuine, saving faith. There was an Edwards - like emphasis on the necessity of affections for Christ, and exhortation on how to achieve or increase our love for Christ.

We have had some discouragements and also some encouragements since returning. But God has been faithful in it all. We miss our dear friends in Toronto, but we also look to the Lord with anticipation for the future.

We're Off

2006-05-12T05:35:00.000-07:00

Goodbye sleek and chic Toronto... Hello Alberta, where everything is bigger, brighter and blonder.

Today we begin the drive home.

To all our friends in Toronto, we will miss you so much (my eyes are in a semi-permanent puffy state from crying so much this week). To all our friends and family out West, we are looking forward to seeing you very soon!

Jonathan & Sarah Edwards on Finding Happiness in God Above all Others

2006-05-03T23:32:00.000-07:00

When reading about a wonderful marriage like Jonathan and Sarah Edwards enjoyed, it can be tempting to become too consumed with thoughts of this relationship--as if marriage was an end in itself. How typical of us sinners to dwell on a wonderful blessing in place of the One who blesses. I love reading how Edwards looked to God alone for his ultimate happiness and satisfaction. I am challenged by how this godly man, who valued his wife very highly, viewed God as infinitely better than any earthly thing. He says:

God is the highest good of the reasonable creature, and the enjoyment of him is the only happiness with which our souls can be satisfied. — To go to heaven fully to enjoy God, is infinitely better than the most pleasant accommodations here. Fathers and mothers, husbands, wives, children, or the company of earthly friends, are but shadows. But the enjoyment of God is the substance. These are but scattered beams, but God is the sun. These are but streams, but God is the fountain. These are but drops, but God is the ocean. — Therefore it becomes us to spend this life only as a journey towards heaven, as it becomes us to make the seeking of our highest end and proper good, the whole work of our lives, to which we should subordinate all other concerns of life. Why should we labor for, or set our hearts on anything else, but that which is our proper end, and true happiness? (Edwards, "Christian Pilgrim," in The works of Jonathan Edwards)

With his death fast approaching, he told his daughter Lucy:

Dear Lucy, It seems to me to be the will of God, that I must shortly leave you; therefore give my kindest love to my dear wife, and tell her, that the uncommon union, which has so long subsisted between us, has been of such a nature, as I trust is spiritual, and therefore will continue forever: and I hope she will be supported under so great a trial, and submit cheerfully to the will of God. And as to my children, you are now like to be left fatherless; which I hope will be an inducement to you all, to seek a father who will never fail you. (Dwight, "Memoirs," in The Works of Jonathan Edwards as quoted by Moore, Good Christians, Good Husbands?, p.126)

I am always astounded when I read Sarah's response to her husband's death. I wonder if I could respond as she does if God chose to take my husband. When she heard of her husband's death, she wrote to her daughter:

O my very Dear Child, What shall I say. A holy and good God has covered us with a dark cloud. O that we may all kiss the rod and lay our hands on our mouths. The Lord has done it. He has made me adore his goodness that we had him so long. But my God lives and he has my heart. O what a legacy my husband and your father has left us. We are all given to God and there I am and love to be. (In Burr, Journal, 301. as quoted by Moore in Good Christians, Good Husbands?, p.126)

Oh, to sincerely love God even more than our greatest earthly blessing! To say amidst great trials that God has our heart. To 'kiss the rod' and 'adore his goodness.' To be fully satisfied in Christ alone and say, "there I am and love to be." I pray that God would do this work in my heart.

Good Christians = Good Husbands? Part 2

2006-04-25T15:56:00.000-07:00

The best part of this book by Doreen Moore, is how it made me think about the purpose of marriage and our responsibilities in marriage, with more depth and nuance than I previously had. For instance, what does it mean for a wife to be a "helper" (Gen. 2:18)? Is this speaking specifically about helping your husband to excel in his public work and ministry? Is it right for a man to marry a woman in order to enhance his ministry? What is the ultimate purpose in being man's helper? Should one's time spent in public ministry change if they get married?

The aspect of marriage that I hear most often discussed in Evangelical circles is a man's leadership and a woman's submission to his leadership. And while I strongly affirm this biblical truth, I believe there are other aspects of marriage spoken of in the bible that are largely neglected.

For instance, Malachi 2:14 speaks of a man's wife as his "companion and ... wife by covenant." I have not often heard it said that 'companionship' is a purpose of marriage. I was fascinated as Moore described Jonathan Edwards view of this aspect of the marriage dynamic:

The husband chose his wife to be close to him above all others. They share each other's joys and sorrows. They do all they can to help one another and seek the good and comfort of the other. "They rejoice in each other." Sarah was Jonathan's nearest and most intimate companion. Edwards also said that God commands "so great and dear a friendship to be maintained" (p.117).

The necessity of intentionally cultivating this kind of deep friendship in marriage is not something that I've thought a lot about (however, I am very thankful for my husband who has certainly done this.)

I was also interested to hear how

"Edwards clearly taught that married couples should seek to understand each other and meet each other's needs. However, the emphasis is on self-denial for the good and the happiness of the other, not the selfish demands that one's needs be met" (p.119).

It certainly takes time and effort to "understand" your spouse, and to be able from that understanding to act in a way that would benefit them. It is a special marriage when each understands the other's insecurities and can effectively encourage them, or when each knows best how to please their spouse and make their quality of life better.

Another aspect of marriage that Moore touches on is the necessity of meeting each other's sexual needs (1 Cor. 7:3-4), and not depriving one another for long (1 Cor. 7:5) (p.142) . (I can't help wondering how John Wesley, George Whitefield, David Livingstone and others who were gone from their families for such extended periods of time could ignore or somehow 'deal' with this verse.) Prov. 5:15-19 speaks of a man being sexually satisfied in his wife alone and that he should 'be intoxicated always in her love." (This seems to go expressly against Whitefield's view that love is a "foolish passion." See my earlier post here.) Jonathan Edwards seemed to enjoy this part of his marriage and commented that"the conjugal relation leads the persons united therein to the most intimate acquaintance and conversation with each other" (p.117).

Of course, she also mentions Ephesians 5:22(p.142). It is mind boggling to think that the sacrificial love, submission, cherishing and oneness that goes on in marriage is reflective of Christ and the church! What a privilege to be able to testify of this relationship in day to day life!

Some of the other responsibilities and purposes she lists are spiritual encouragement (Ecc. 4:9-12), producing godly children (Mal. 2:14), and that wives should obey their husbands and that husbands should live with their wives "in an understanding way" (1 Pet 3:7), which she rightly points out, necessitates that the husband is living with his wife and doing it in and understanding way.

In conclusion, I agree with Moore that marriage does necessitate changes in one's life and ministry. 1 Cor. 7:32-34 makes that clear. I believe that serving your family is a ministry and marriage in itself is testimony of the deep things of God. It probably should be said that the opposite could be true, and that someone could make an idol out of marriage to the neglect of other responsibilities that God has called them to. However, biblical responsibilities in marriage should not be neglected in the name of "ministry."

Good Christians = Good Husbands? Part 1

2006-04-23T16:11:00.000-07:00

I've been wanting to read Good Christians, Good Husbands? for a while, so when my husband brought it home from the library, I was eager to read it. This book by Doreen Moore looks into the marriages of three godly men who did much good for the Kingdom of God, namely, John Wesley, Jonathan Edwards, and George Whitefield.

The fundamental issue she brings to light is whether a man's public ministry should take precedence over his family, or whether time spent serving his family should equally be considered the "work of the Lord." With each of these men she seeks to define their convictions regarding the role of a husband and father, their convictions regarding the role of a minister of the Gospel, and then how these convictions shaped their marriages.

She also touches on their wives, specifically, how they responded to their husband's convictions and how these women contributed to the marriage. This book is certainly useful for both men and women who seek to have a God honoring marriage, and who desire to find a proper balance between family and public ministry.

According to Moore, John Wesley believed that the Methodist cause was of a higher priority than marriage (p. 30). His public ministry was "the work of the Lord," while marriage was seen as a distraction from this work. He apparently told his brother two weeks after he married that "he had no more thought of a woman than for any other being: that he married to break down the prejudice about the world and him" (p.34). In other words, he married Molly to enhance his reputation, but had no more affection for her than any other person (p.34). I won't go into all the gory details of their marriage here, but it is enough to say that it ended in separation and he recorded in his journal that he did not even know that his wife died until "a day or two after" (p.58).

When George Whitefield proposed to a woman, he wrote to her parents, "For, I bless GOD, if I know any thing of my own heart, I am free from that foolish passion, which the world calls LOVE." To the woman he wrote, "The passionate expressions which carnal courtiers use, I think ought to be avoided by those that would marry in the LORD. I can only promise, by the help of GOD, to keep my matrimonial vow, and to do what I can towards helping you forward in the great work of your salvation." Moore goes on to say, "In our day and age, we might find his proposal formal and unaffectionate. Perhaps the young woman did too. Shortly after, she married... another man!" (p.68).

When Whitefield did marry, it seems that his wife was fully aware of his views on romance, and that he placed his public ministry above his marriage. According to Moore, she had to bare alone "frequent sickness, probably four miscarriages, and the death of her son" while her husband was pursuing his itinerant ministry (p. 85). However, she seemed fully accepting of this and as a result they enjoyed a cordial marriage.

When men such as John Wesley and George Whitefield, and others like William Carey and David Livingstone, have done so much good for the Kingdom, it can be easy to overlook the fact that they neglected or deserted their families. (David Livingstone only lived with his wife for 4 out of their 17 years of marriage) (p.11). One would think that if they had taken more time to care for their families, they would not been able to accomplish as much for God. However, Moore makes the good point in her conclusion that "we must remember, we only know what happened. We do not know what would have happened if another course was followed." She cites the example of Charles Wesley who "slowed down his labors for his family," giving him opportunity to write more hymns and pass down this "rich heritage" to the church (p.153).

Artistic Tolerance?

2006-04-22T17:42:00.000-07:00

I just got back from singing in a Showcase Concert at the Royal Conservatory. The concert went well, however, I was struck again by how often Christian morals are either made little of or straight out rejected in the arts community. As I looked over the program, I noticed that they had cut one sentence from my bio:

She is active in her church and loves to spend time with her husband, Clint.

All my other listed hobbies were left in...I guess faith and family were not relevant? It's ironic considering these are the two most important things in my life!

Do You Know What You're Asking For?

2006-04-14T07:38:00.000-07:00

Cowboyology has directed me to an article by Mark Dever entitled, "Nothing But the Blood." In it, Dever deals with the various theories of the atonement, what the critics are saying, and what the Scriptures say. I highly recommend this article.

With the atonement being minimized and discredited by certain groups in the Christian community, it has compelled me to revisit the scriptures for clarity. Today being 'Good Friday', it is timely to be wrestling with Christ's atonement. Why did He have to die? Why does God not simply forgive us? Was Christ's death actually necessary or was it just one way among many for Jesus to show His great love for us?

Fortunately, the Scriptures do not leave us to wonder why Christ died, what type of sacrifice it was, and, how that sacrifice affects us. In fact, the Scriptures (old and new) are saturated with news of the atonement. Isaiah 53 says:

But he was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all. He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth. By oppression and judgment he was taken away; and as for his generation, who considered that he was cut off out of the land of the living, stricken for the transgression of my people? And they made his grave with the wicked and with a rich man in his death, although he had done no violence, and there was no deceit in his mouth. Yet it was the will of the LORD to crush him; he has put him to grief; when his soul makes an offering for sin, he shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days; the will of the LORD shall prosper in his hand. Out of the anguish of his soul he shall see and be satisfied; by his knowledge shall the righteous one, my servant, make many to be accounted righteous, and he shall bear their iniquities. Therefore I will divide him a portion with the many, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong, because he poured out his soul to death and was numbered with the transgressors; yet he bore the sin of many, and makes intercession for the transgressors.

How humbling to think that the sinless Almighty Son of God went to the cross "like a lamb that is led to the slaughter." That He was "crushed for our iniquities" when the "LORD ... laid on him the iniquity of us all."

I am struck with how often I take the cross for granted--how easy it is to be presumptuous on God's grace, and to be forgetful of the great cost of our salvation. I am reminded of Sinclair Ferguson's words in his book, Deserted By God?, where he speaks of what David is unwittingly asking for in Psalm 51:

In asking for "mercy," David, you are asking that God will show it to you, but withdraw it from Jesus.
In asking to experience God's "unfailing love," you are asking that Jesus will feel it has been removed.
In asking to taste God's "great compassion," you are asking him to refuse it to Jesus as he dies on the cross.
In asking God to "blot out" your transgressions, you are asking that they will be obliterated by the blood of Jesus.
In asking to be washed, you are asking that the filth of your sin will overwhelm Jesus like a flood.
In asking to know the joy of salvation, you are asking that Jesus will be a Man of Sorrows, familiar with grief.
In asking to be saved from bloodguilt, you are asking that in your place Jesus will be treated as though he were guilty.
In asking that your lips will be opened in praise, you are asking that Jesus will be silenced, as a sheep before her shearers is dumb.
In asking that the sacrifice of a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart be acceptable, you are asking that Jesus' heart and spirit will be broken.
In asking that God will hide his face from your sins, you are asking that he will hide his face from Jesus.
In asking that you will not be cast out of God's presence, you are asking that Jesus will be cast out into outer darkness instead.

Is that what we want? It is the only thing that will prevent a sense of the absence of God from becoming permanent in our life. But dare we ask God to do this for us? To obligate himself to love us in such a manner as this? We do not need to ask him. He has already done it.

Bittersweet Partings

2006-04-13T18:06:00.000-07:00

Tonight I received a book from the women at my bible study called Five Women of the English Reformation in light of our bible study finishing up for the year. (A book which I have wanted to read for a while--thanks girls!)

It has stuck me for the first time that we (my husband and I) are leaving Toronto for good in only a month, and I am suddenly saddened.
Our friends here are so dear to us. Our church family is relatively small, as a result we are quite close--knit together by our common love for Christ.

The seminary community (where my husband teaches Greek) has also been a source of kinship. My husband has benefited greatly from some of his colleagues. Two couples from this community in particular, Justin & Elisha Galotti and Ian & Vicky Clary, are like family to us. We all live on the same block and see each other often for fellowship. They are godly people who I highly respect and love. I never leave their company without feeling encouraged and refreshed in the faith.

This time in Toronto has been sweet in terms of fellowship. I am almost tempted to forget that we live in a 'cement city' with polluted and sometimes foul smelling air, mice, cockroaches, bedbugs, prostitution, drug dealers and murders on our front sidewalk.

That last rant actually made me feel a little better about moving.

What Brian McLaren's Friends Say...

2006-04-09T13:22:00.000-07:00

Last night we went to hear Brian McLaren, the Emergent Church guru, speak at Richview Baptist Church. With the Emergent movement picking up momentum in North America, I often hear about it, but have had difficulty understanding exactly what it's distinctives are.

Of course the stereotype that comes to mind is the candelit service of 18-29 year olds, sitting on sofas drinking coffee, surrounded by art work for inspiration. The men all with their poetic goatees and piercings and the women with their post-modern counterparts.

After listening to a fairly lengthy Q&A period with McLaren, I can see why it can be difficult to define the Emergent movement. I don't think he made a single ringing affirmative about what he believes to be true throughout the evening. When asked a direct question he would often tell a rather vague story, or reply by saying, "I have a friend who said this" (implying that he agreed, but not taking credit for it and therefore not taking criticism for it either) or else he would reply with a question such as "What is the question behind that question?" While I agreed with some of his critiques of our culture, there were many times when I felt like banging my head against the wall because he would not give a straight answer to anything. Everything was so ambiguous and safe. He seemed to want to avoid conflicts at all cost.

I think this may be intentional. He was modeling his idea of humility, namely, that he wants people to become uncertain of any beliefs they hold strongly, and become perplexed (and therefore humble) and "join the conversation" that has no conclusions.

The funniest part of the evening was when someone noted that McLaren had the ability to avoid conflicts by raising the conversation to "a higher level," and asked if it was "a discipline" of his--to which McLaren answered in the affirmative. (Who would have thought that not answering questions was a "discipline!")

The saddest part of the evening was when he began to minimize the atonement, and tell a story to discredit penal substitution--well, it wasn't his story, but a "friend's" story.

And then he preceded to say that we should shift our attention from the atonement to the incarnation and think of the world not as sinful, but "sick" and Jesus as "medicine" and as the kingdom grows the medicine spreads--well actually, that wasn't his idea either, but a "friend's" idea.

When asked about the homosexual question, he said he believed it was not a theological question, but a missiological question (or was that a"friend's" conviction too?) And said it was up to each individual church to decide. If I understand him right, he is saying we should change depending on our culture. So that if we live in a community with a high homosexual population, we should be accepting and say it is alright, but if we live in a community where homosexuality is not widely accepted, we should not be so quick to accept it as kosher.

While he affirmed that abortion was wrong, he minimized it by asking why, if people are really so concerned about killing babies, are they not more concerned about global warming and it's effect on human life.

The impression I got from the evening was that the Emergent movement, in trying to engage our post-modern culture, has taken on the shape of our culture--shying away from absolute truths and believing in something that is so neutral that it couldn't possibly offend anyone.

And I couldn't help thinking of Mrs. Elton's false humility in Jane Austen's Emma. When complimented on her sandwiches, she responds with something like, "While I don't say so, my friends say I certainly know how to make a sandwich."

Arts and Culture at Reformation 21

2006-04-01T13:12:00.000-08:00

The current issue of Reformation 21's online magazine contains some interesting music articles by Derek Thomas and Carl Trueman.

Derek Thomas writes an excellent article on Dimitri Shostakovich, a twentieth century Russian composer who lived under Stalin's regime. Shostakovich's music is characterized by dark and dissonant harmonies and very much reflects the horrors of his time.

Thomas' article is a good introduction to the famous composer, and it also answers some important questions for Christians in assessing the importance and worthiness of the arts. For instance, does "good" art come only from the minds and emotions of Christians? Is dissonant music less "Christian" than harmonious music? Was the apostle Paul culturally grey, and should we even invest time and energy into fine arts?

I have done some thinking on these questions lately, but it seems that Thomas would call a lot of my conclusions "naive". As I recall learning about the significant composers in University, I remember being shocked at the moral corruption and even evil insanity of some genius composers. My tendency is to think that their music is tainted because of who they are and that music of a "Christian composer" such as J.S. Bach is more commendable, lovely and excellent (Phil. 4:8). However, Thomas rightly points out that music composed by Christians is not intrinsically better than music composed by unbelievers and that "Christians are capable of appallingly bad judgments and poorly expressed artistic productions." You just have to turn on the Christian radio station to know this it true!

I have also thought that perhaps Christians should compose music with structure, consonance and beautiful harmonies as a reflection of God's order and beauty. And although I do enjoy a little chaos and dissonance in music, it does seem to convey more of the passions of the flesh. But Thomas makes the good point that this type of music can more accurately display the struggle of man and concludes his article by saying, "some truths can only be heard in minor keys."

On a lighter note, Carl Trueman admits he watches American Idol. It's a bit surprising, but I have to respect him for admitting it and being able to laugh at himself. He has some excellent insights into North American culture and our obsession with idolatry. After reading his article, I wonder if I'm a bit of a sadist. Be prepared to laugh because he's hilarious.

Movie Night

2006-03-29T18:10:00.000-08:00

With Clint being so sick these last three weeks, I must admit we have rented far more movies than usual. A personal favorite for us is the hit tv series "24". A show about a U.S. based counter- terrorist unit working to prevent catastrophic terrorist crimes from happening--all within a literal 24 hour day (each episode is an hour).

But last night after watching a few episodes, Clint and I both had adrenaline-pumping, action-packed dreams that caused us to awake with our hearts pounding. We had a good laugh as we recounted our dreams to each other. Between the two of us, we encountered everything from volcanoes erupting and running for our lives only to find a ten story river blocking us from the only train station that could get us out of town, to anxiety about important CD ROM files being corrupted, to terrorists chasing us and trying to shoot us, and of course, plenty of cell phones that flip open.

Alas, we've concluded that in light of the lack of sleep and strain to our hearts, we need to take a break from 24. As good as the show is, we're not sure the negative affects on our heath are worth it.

Does the Birth Control Pill Cause Abortions?

2006-03-24T18:08:00.000-08:00

This question has consumed much of my thoughts over the last few weeks.

I must admit that I've heard rumblings in the past about the abortive effect of the pill, but always passed it off as an "extreme" or "uninformed" opinion. Not only has my doctor told me that the pill prevents ovulation, but the oral contraceptive pill is also widely accepted among evangelicals and is often recommended by Christian doctors as a valid option for birth control. Surely they could not all be wrong!

My views were challenged recently while listening to a sermon by Dr. Mohler entitled Naked and Not Ashamed: Message 2-- Reproductive Techniques and Contraception . In this message he says we should be careful about using new technology, because it can have significant ethical consequences. We shouldn't assume that the technologies are neutral or even good, and he also mentions that there is research that shows that some oral contraceptive pills cause abortions.

Since then, I have done a fair amount of reading on the issue and found that pro-life doctors are divided. It seems to come down to the fact that there is simply not enough research done to show conclusively whether the claimed abortive back up mechanism actually takes place. The hormones in the pill cause changes in the endometrium (inner lining of the uterus) which is said to reduce the likelihood of the implantation of a fertilized egg should ovulation occur.

I searched various websites of pastors and ministries that I trust, but found very little on the subject. Desiring God ministries does make a statement about birth control. I was surprised, but somewhat relieved to find that they are not against the use of "artificial" birth control, and even link to an article called, "Why Pro-Life Advocates Should Not Link Abortion to Contraception in Public Debates."

While there are many good articles by pro-life physicians representing each side of the argument, discovering the truth can be difficult because everyone is contradicting each other. There are many theories in circulation and much conjecture. After reading many of these articles, I found I was more informed, but also more confused.

The best booklet that I read on the subject is by a pastor named Randy Alcorn who believes the birth control pill is abortive. I have yet to hear of anyone else who has compiled such thorough research. It seems that he uses less conjecture and more fact as he has extensive documentation to back up his statements. He has consulted the Physician's Desk Reference, medical journals and textbooks, the pill manufacturers, and many physicians and pharmacists. The whole booklet can be found online here.

Some other articles I found helpful were the following:

Hormone Contraceptives Controversies and Clarifications
(Authored by four Christian ProLife Obstetrician-Gynecologists who feel the pill is not abortive.)

Birth Control Pill: Abortifacient and Contraceptive
(Physicians who believe the pill is abortive.)

Do Oral Contraceptives Cause Abortions?
(Prolife Physicians who discuss the points of disagreement within the prolife community and take a neutral position.)

Is the Oral Contraceptive Pill an Abortifacient?
(A pharmacologist's article written in response to a critique of Alcorn's position.)

"A Thousand Lives We Falsely Imagine"

2006-03-03T05:54:00.000-08:00

In studying 1 Timothy, I have been struck by the necessity of Christians pursuing true contentment. I find it is quite natural to desire things that I don't have, and quite attractive to dwell on these things in the name of future dreams and goals.

1 Timothy 6:6-9 says:

Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction.

Paul is not speaking of the rich falling into temptation and snares, but those who desire to be rich are "plunged into ruin and destruction." It is this intense desire for something we don't have overwhelms us with anxiety and sinks us low. We plan and scheme as if the weight of our future were entirely on our own shoulders. It may be a desire for financial security, a spouse, children, more education, a better job, losing weight or perhaps even being a spiritual 'superstar.'

Difficulty arises because pursuing these desires may be going expressly against what God would have for us. Do you desire to be rich? Perhaps God would have for you to be poor. In Calvin's commentary, he says:

Our covetousness is an insatiable gulf, if it be not restrained;...the best bridle is, when we desire nothing more than the necessity of this life demands;...the reason why we transgress the bounds, is, that our anxiety extends to a thousand lives which we falsely imagine.

I am starting to see that while it is good for Christians to wisely plan for the future, it is extremely important that we do not waste our thoughts longing for the future, especially because this future is not real, but rather "falsely imagined." Maybe we won't live to see tomorrow.

The thing we covet will begin to take over our lives, and yet, this sickly craving can never find true satisfaction. We will always be striving for an unattainable goal.

Although it can be difficult, these words Psalm 34:10 ring true:

"The young lions suffer want and hunger: but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing."

Grossed Out By the Cost of Sin

2006-02-25T06:51:00.000-08:00

Martha_Martha has been posting on law and gospel. It is something that has also peeked my interest lately because I have been reading Leviticus. This time, I am going through it in more detail than I have previously, and pretty much every morning when I read, I'm totally disgusted.

The things they had to do in order to appease God's wrath against their sin under the law horrifies me. It makes me extremely thankful that we live in a time where Christ has fulfilled the law. (Matt. 5:17)

Although, I suppose when the priests performed those awful sacrifices, it would be a good reminder of just how disgusting sin actually is.

It seems like we, living under the new covenant, often view our sin through 'rose colored glasses.' It's so typical of Evangelicals to downplay the gravity of sin and therefore downplay the significance of the cross.

As my favorite cowboy likes to joke, "If you're going to wear a cross around your neck, you might as well wear an electric chair as ornamentation." I suppose if you were going to make a comparison, execution on a cross is a lot more grotesque than execution by an electric chair, and yet too often we think of Christ's death for our sin as a sanitized and almost romanticized event.

...He had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he has borne our grief's and carried our sorrows;yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his stripes we are healed. (Is 53)

Calvin on 1Timothy 5:24

2006-02-25T06:24:00.000-08:00

“We must bear what cannot be immediately corrected; we must sigh and groan,while the time for the remedy is not fully come; and we must not apply force to diseases, till they are either ripened or laid open. On the other hand, when virtue does not receive the honor which it deserves, we must wait for the full time of revelation, and endure the stupidity of the world, and wait quietly in darkness till the day dawn.”

(His online commentary can be found here.)

Does Thin Equal Beautiful?

2006-02-10T06:07:00.000-08:00

While browsing the Girl Talk blog, I came across a link to Ed Welch's message, Does Thin Equal Beautiful?. This grabbed my attention because I love Welch's book, When People are Big and God is Small.

I was surprised when he answered his own question with, "Yes, in our culture, thin equals beautiful."

It was a good reminder of the subtlety and danger of legalism in our lives. He is specifically talking about our Western obsession with food, diet, beauty and the wide spread problem of eating disorders. However, as he unpacked what an eating disorder was, it really just came down to legalism, and I found his message applicable to any area of life that legalism taints.

As a teenaged ballerina, my friends and I were all obsessed with food and our weight. In fact the amount of time we wasted thinking on these topics would probably be shocking to some people. I was amazed at Welch's insight into the life of a woman with an eating disorder.

It really is a works-righteousness. You sort of try to meet God half way, probably without realizing that is what you are doing. There is a sense of elation or worthiness when you have eaten well (in other words, very little), and a deep, overwhelming sense of guilt if you have eaten too much, which can only be explained as guilt over breaking a self-imposed law.

It is a matter of feeling guilty or righteous before God, yourself and other people based wholly on what you yourself have done.

Besides eating habits, in how many other areas of our lives do we fall into this pattern of thinking. Do we feel righteous or guilty based on how clean our house is, how much hospitality we have shown, how much we have evangelized, or how much time we have spent reading the bible that day?

Obviously these are all good things, but how easy it is to fall into the trap of feeling we are contributing to, or lessening our righteous status by doing (or not doing) these things well. A status that is in truth based exclusively on the work of Jesus Christ on our behalf.

When we fall into legalistic thinking, we are very much consumed with self. For this reason, Welch says it is often not enough to say pat Christian phrases such as, "Jesus thinks your beautiful" or "you need to find your identity in Christ." As true as these things may be, Welch says there is a need to find something greater outside of ourselves that draws our thoughts outward to something infinitely more beautiful than ourselves.

Welch uses the example of the throne room of God as described in Revelation 4. When standing before this holy God in all His majesty, we will not be thinking about ourselves. It would be nearly impossible for a person to be standing in such an awesome presence and be thinking about their appearance or clean house or good works.

After turning our eyes to Christ, his second point is that we should begin to think about other people. Not in a self serving kind of way, but rather thinking on how we can serve others and love others.

It seem that the "cure" for this type of self absorbed legalism boils down to Jesus words in Matthew 22,

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.

Lord of the Rings Meets Ikea

2006-02-03T07:12:00.000-08:00

We saw the Canadian Opera Company's version of Gotterdammerung (the doom of the gods) last night, the final opera of Wagner's famous 'Ring Cycle'. In it, hatred and greed for a powerful golden ring causes the downfall of the gods, but the ring is finally destroyed in the only place it can be, the Rhine river, saving the world of mortals.

It was about 5 hours long, and yet I can't say I was bored for a minute. Between the singers and the orchestra, it was overwhelmingly pleasurable. The music was epic, dark and hauntingly beautiful. At least three soloists had the ability to pierce us with their singing. They had that indefinable quality that gives you tingles all over.

It is amazing to me that someone could compose 5 hours of genius music without relying on repetition to fill time. For those of you who don't know opera, most of it is extremely repetitive and has little breaks, sometimes with spoken text between the arias, recitatives and chorus numbers. Wagner's operas are composed straight through, always changing to accompany the libretto, with no major musical repetitions, and the music keeps flowing between scenes.

There are repetitive motifs or themes woven throughout the opera. Clint was more astute in picking these out than I was, but once we figured out which was which, it was pretty fascinating. For instance, there was always Siegfried's horn motif before he arrived on a scene, and the 'ride of the Valkyries' motif played when Brunnhilde's sister, the Valkyrie Waltraute, came to visit her.

There was one aspect of the opera that I didn't particularly like. They set the scene in modern times with Ikea-like furniture and flat screen computer monitors. Somehow they managed to pull it off. We didn't even blink when the Nibelung warrior's wore modern black business suits while carrying tall silver spears. The only thing they couldn't represent in this modern setting was Brunnhilde's horse.

All that to say, I would love to see the original Viking setting of the Ring Cycle, with yellow braids and horned metal helmets, but I was more than satisfied with being able to experience this version.

The Irony of the Stage Mom

2006-02-01T18:12:00.000-08:00

At the dance studio where I teach, I teased one of the mothers that she deserved the "parent of the year" award. I teach her daughter tap, and she is always at the studio helping not only her daughter, but also at least five other girls get ready for tap class. We got into a conversation about parenting and she exclaimed,

"You're not thinking about having kids, are you?"

I replied that I did want to have children a some point. To this she replied,

"You better think carefully about having kids. Your life will never be the same."

Another mom piped in,

"The best years of my life were when I was married before I had kids."

This topic was apparently popular with all the women in the waiting room, because after this I heard a series of complaints.

"All the money goes to the kids. You can't get anything for yourself."

"Make sure you do everything you want to do before you have kids. Go to shows, travel... because you never get to do anything after."

Something in me strongly resists the idea that life ends after you have kids. That the best is over, and the worst is yet to come. So in an attempt to turn the conversation around, I said lightheartedly,

"But you would not want to go back in time, would you? Don't you prefer your life now?"

"If I could go back in time," replied the 'mother of the year', "I would not have had my kids."

"Are you joking?"

"No, if I knew what I know now, I would not have had kids."

Needless to say, I was horrified, and speechless. All the other kids were standing around hearing this. This woman must have known much sorrow, but how could a mother say that? No woman in the room contradicted her, if fact, they all seemed to affirm her in her selfishness.

Maybe I am just naive, but I get excited when thinking about the privilege that women have to influence the next generation. I love reading about women like Sarah Edwards who found joy in raising the next generation to serve and glorify God. She worked hard in her life, but seemed to have great joy, and many of her children and later descendants are reported to have served society in great ways. (All our books are packed up since the bedbug incident, so I can't give an exact reference.)

I must admit that there seems to be few examples of Proverbs 31 type moms today, but ones I know are characterized by love and joy, and there is something truly beautiful about their lives.

Tagged in Fours

2006-01-29T14:36:00.000-08:00

I've been tagged by the home maker:

Four jobs I've had:
- Dance instructor/choreographer
- Singing teacher
- Pilates instructor
- Gap sales attendant

Four places I've lived:
- Prince George, BC
- Penticton, BC
- Calgary, AB
- Toronto, ON

Four vacations I've taken: (I haven't had four vacations, so I'll just mention some trips I've taken.)

- Cuba (our honeymoon)

- Scotland (This was a singing audition for a masters voice program in Glasgow...I didn't get it, but my brother and I had fun touring around Scotland.)

- Austria/Hungary (well...this was actually a tour for my University chamber choir. Vienna was beautiful, but the food was way better in Budapest.)

The only vehicle I've owned:
- Ford Sable

Pilates and Intelligent Design

2006-01-10T19:02:00.000-08:00

I just completed four intensive hours of anatomy, the first step in my pilates teacher training certification.

The intricate and complex design of the human body is a little overwhelming to comprehend. Tonight I have only scratched the surface of the muscular and skeletal systems, and yet I am struck by how each of the many muscles, ligaments, tendons and bones are integrated so perfectly for the human body to function.

Each detail has reason behind it, and a distinct purpose in the masterpiece of the human body. The study of anatomy points strongly to a Designer. Even the instructor who said:

"We don't really need the psoas minor any more, it was only necessary when we walked on all fours",

could say in the next breath,

"The way the femur attaches into the hip socket is a genius design."

And later another student asked,

"Why is the lumbar spine designed like...um...I mean...whatever you believe...what is the purpose of it's limited range of motion in rotation?"

As we saw the purpose and function of everything, it was pretty difficult to talk about the human body as mere random chance. Presupposing evolution made it hard for anyone to ask "why?" without contradicting themselves.

I am reminded of Psalm 139:

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them.

How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I would count them, they are more than the sand.

Creation undeniably points to the glory of the Creator. What joy to know that we are "fearfully and wonderfully made" in a way that transcends even our profound physical make-up. Studying anatomy has helped me appreciate again the wonder of God having "intricately woven" us in secret. Who can comprehend the greatness of the mind of God?

The Joys of Apartment Living

2006-01-03T02:36:00.000-08:00

First it was mice, then cockroaches, and the latest is bedbugs. Yes, BEDBUGS! Apparently they thrive in hotels and apartment buildings moving quickly from room to room.

The day before we flew out to Alberta for Christmas, I had about ten red marks on my shoulder. I thought at first it was some sort of a rash, but most people who saw them thought they must be spider bites.

They faded into nonexistence during our week in Alberta, but after our first night back in TO, I woke up with about 15 to 20 bites on my leg, arm and face (all trailing in a line up the left side of my body). I thought, "this must be an angry spider."

We searched and searched to find the elusive spider in our bedroom, but to no avail. So off to Home Depot to buy spider Raid. We sprayed the floor and base of the bed, and thought if he was hiding in the bed, this would surely kill him.

Mysteriously, Clint didn't have a bite on him. Perhaps the spider was hiding on my side of the bed? Clint was gracious enough to switch sides of the bed with me so I could try to get some sleep that night.

For the next two nights, I received two new bites a night on my hip and leg. Less than before, but the bites were still swollen, red and itchy, and I wasn't about to let this keep happening. Either this spider was incredibly resilient, or this was not a spider biting me. And why was Clint not getting bitten?

Needless to say, we figured out that we have bed bugs, and have taken measures to deal with them. I have now had three biteless nights, but I have yet to sleep through the night for fear of blood-sucking bugs crawling on me.

Apart from a single break down the first night after we discovered the bedbugs, God has been gracious in helping me to deal with my fear (which was no small thing). Perhaps this is training ground for becoming a real farm wife. After my downtown Toronto experience, the creepy crawly creatures on our Alberta farm seem a little tamer.

My Hope For Christmas

2005-12-20T05:55:00.000-08:00

It seems that despite all the Christmas talk about the Saviour coming into the world, I can subtly slip into viewing God wrongly. Sometimes, without even realizing it, I act as if the cross were fairly impotent, as if I was weighed down by the bondage of sin, and as if God were far from me or withholding good things from me.

I often feel the tension between being freed from sin, and yet still prone to it. The difficulty of living as part of the new creation, and yet in this sinful decaying body.

I know my tendency can be to become too focused on my sin. My pastor preached an excellent sermon the other week on John 17:20-26. He spoke of the character of the Father and that He would love us so much that he sent His very own Son to die, and how the victorious Christ even now prays for us.

Even in light of this, we sometimes tend to walk around defeated as if there were no victory in Christ. My pastor said something to the affect of, "Some Christians have a morbid fascination with their own sin."

This stuck me painfully as I saw my own error, but with that pain, incredible joy as I was reoriented to the wonderful truth of the gospel.

This morning I read Zephaniah 3:14-17.

Sing aloud, O daughter of Zion; shout, O Israel! Rejoice and exult with all your heart, O daughter The LORD has taken away the judgments against you; he has cleared away your enemies. On that day it shall be said to Jerusalem: "Fear not, O Zion; let not your hands grow weak. The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.

I am amazed that this mighty, awesome God would rejoice and exalt over poor sinners. My hope for this Christmas is that I will be quieted by His love, trusting in the power and sufficiency of the cross, and that I will be able to truly rejoice over the "mighty one" who came to save.

The Lessons We Teach

2005-12-15T15:01:00.000-08:00

The Home Maker, or as her husband so affectionately calls her, "Mrs. Potato", has written a great post on lessons she is teaching her little boys here.

For those of you who don't know Marlene, she is the ideal, Proverbs 31 type wife and mother. In a day when biblical womanhood is under attack, I am so thankful for her example.

Pride & Prejudice

2005-12-12T08:35:00.000-08:00

My husband and I saw the new Pride & Prejudice movie last night. My great expectations were not disappointed. The acting was excellent, the scenic shots breathtaking, and the setting seemed even more accurate than the A&E version.

For example, there was real mud and the filthiness of pigs and chickens around the Bennet home. There was also a marked difference in lifestyle between the Bennet's and the upper crust of society, such as Bingley, Darcy, and the De Bourgh's. The Bennet's clothes were plainer, their home more run down, and there was much less decorum to their lives in general.

My one complaint was that some of my favorite dialogue was either cut or watered down, and I wasn't so keen on how Elizabeth Bennet was portrayed. (I guess that's two complaints.)

With the cuts they made in this new version, there was nothing distinctly Christian about the manners, conversation and lifestyle of the main characters. Everything with a direct reference to God or church was cut out, except for the foolish clergyman, Mr Collins. Also, you often did not know the moral struggles behind Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet's decisions and actions. You were left to believe that they merely acted on their impulses, on whatever their 'gut feeling' was.

In the book (and the A&E mini-series) Elizabeth shows great restraint and maturity in her speech and demeanor, so when she says something passionately you feel it's important. You respect her for the farsightedness of her restraint, especially when it would have been so tempting to blab the juicy news.

You also respect her because she is unmoved by the beauty, power, and riches of society's key players. Who she is and what she believes does not change depending on the company she is with. She is not easily manipulated or intimidated, but always acts according to what she believes to be true and right.

The version of Elizabeth Bennet played by Keira Knightly is more impulsive and almost childishly temperamental. Perhaps the directors wanted us to be able to relate to her more. Admiring someone for her moral virtues is probably not as big of a hit with modern movie goers as is seeing someone who is no more excellent than the average person in strength of character, and who finds perfect happiness anyway.

I suppose, to be fair though, I should say that the creators of this movie did do a very good job of getting across the main thrust of the story in only two hours. Some of the characters were more interesting in this version than in the mini-series, especially Mr. Bingley and Jane. Darcy, Mr. Collins and Lady Catherine De Bourgh were exceptional as well.

One of the funniest parts of the movie was the conversation we heard when we were leaving. One girl smiled and said to her boyfriend, "You made it through." To which another guy piped in, "Try watching the six hour mini-series!" This was followed by a series of grunts by various other men.

A Sleepless Night in Toronto

2005-12-05T09:20:00.000-08:00

I'm a little groggy this morning after our neighbors kept us up most of the night with their fighting. We finally called the police at 3:30 and were able to get to sleep around 5 am.

It makes me so sad to see the consequences of sin, namely, that a man would want to abuse and manipulate his wife instead of protect her, and that a woman would want to have control and get her way no matter who she hurts and what the cost. Hearing the dark and malicious words coming through the wall felt very oppressive. I am so thankful that there is hope for this dark and dying world. What a stark contrast last night was to" the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ."

I still feel heavy hearted about last night, but I am overwhelmingly thankful for the abundant goodness God has manifested to us, and the glorious truth that sets us free from the bondage and ugliness of sin.

I read this morning from Jesus' words in John 15:9-11,

As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commandments and abide in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.

It gave me great pleasure to think about abiding in Christ's love, and the joy we have in Him, and He in us, when we walk according to His commandments.

I am also reminded of the kindness of God displayed to me in my husband, who always protects me and always points me to Christ. I pray that I would never be presumptuous on God's grace by taking for granted my godly husband who has been an intrument of grace in my life.

"Because People Judge You By Your Friends"

2005-11-26T14:17:00.000-08:00

Christmas shopping has begun, and I'm amazed how heavily marketers rely on the fact that people care what others think of them. I saw one billboard for an upscale clothing store with a slogan that said something to the effect of "Because people judge you by your friends," and it had a picture of a beautiful socialite dressed 'to the nines' surrounded by other beautiful socialites. The industry's marketing scheme is focused on selling an image, in other words, how others see you. It seems that if people are convinced that buying a certain product will elevate them in other's eyes, it's a guaranteed sell.

While it is true that our dress and the things we own should be a testimony to what we believe, how much should a person be concerned with how others view them? It seems there is something in our human nature that craves acceptance, approval and security from other people whether it be our parents, our spouse, our friends, our peer group, our co-workers or even complete strangers.

The problem is that when other's opinions of us become a deciding factor in how we live and what we do, it is giving them more power and more credit than they should have. We often act as if other people have the ability to give or take away ultimate happiness, and we make a god out of mere humans. When our mind is consumed with what others think of us, God seems very small, and we somehow end up fearing man more than we fear God.

We may not be a fearful or timid person by nature, in fact, we may be very outgoing and confident, but "fear of man" does not have so much to do with personality type as it does with how much we let other people control us. Are we elated when someone we respect speaks highly of us? Do we feel better about ourselves when we receive respect and admiration? Are we hurt, angry or defensive when someone disagrees with us or thinks badly of us? Do our degrees and credentials make us feel more secure? Have we ever felt embarrassed to evangelize, even to a complete stranger? Isn't it true that this is nothing other than "fear of man?"

Fearing man can be so subtle in our lives, and yet the sin of idolatry is no small matter. God alone should be consuming our thoughts.

Remembering Phoenix

2005-11-24T07:54:00.000-08:00

My favorite cowboy recently posted about Phoenix and Caballo. It does make me sad to think about Phoenix going to the 'glue factory' seeing as he was the first horse that I ever rode.

There are certain things I don't miss, such as the gaseous emissions that he let out with each step he made, or him tripping on every little twig. I suppose these are merely the evils of his being old and out of shape.

However, there are many things in which we were like-minded. He loved to go slow (mainly because he was lazy), I loved to go slow (mainly because I was scared.) We felt free to chase cows at the speed we were good and comfortable with.

We were both afraid of the bulls. When they started fighting we were happy to go off in the other direction and watch at a distance as Clint and Caballo split up the fight.

He loved to eat, and although his wide belly made it hard to wrap my legs around him, I didn't mind because a wider seat made it easier to stay on.

Ah well, Phoenix is gone, and I suppose all earthly things must come to an end.

A Response to a Thoughtful Comment

2005-11-22T06:23:00.000-08:00

Elisha brought up some great points about style and worship music in her comment on my last post. My response was getting so lengthy that I thought I would just make a new post.

I am still processing my thoughts on the issue of music style in the church service, and this article by Leonard Payton has made me think about some issues that previously I have not thought about to any great extent.

Just to be clear, this is not a hymns verses choruses controversy. Payton is not against contemporary music, in fact he is advocating the creation of new church music either from high culture which is "fundamentally concerned with beauty and form" or folk culture which is concerned with "wholesomeness of community." He is against modeling church music on Christian pop culture because he believes it is money driven. He says, "The artist is not primarily held accountable to God for a transcendent standard of beauty, nor to a local community with ethical responsibility. Rather, the artist must answer to the share holder."

While the Christian artist’s intentions may be good, he says:

The problem is not their intentions, but rather their lines of accountability. There is little potential for church discipline when these people spread some marginal or outright false teaching (which occurs more frequently than anyone cares to admit). Whenever anyone teaches in the church, as Christian music most certainly does, that person displays a low view of the depravity of man when his teaching ministry is accountable to shareholders rather than to ecclesiastical authorities. So it comes as no surprise that we have high-visibility moral lapses inside the Christian music industry that are handled with patchy results. And this crisis has overtaken us because our church discipline is flaccid and we are lax in protecting the doctrinal purity of the church through its music component of the ministry of the Word. This is what happens when we remove the outside authority of Scriptures and of scripturally ordained ecclesiastical authorities.

His point is that music made popular by Christian pop stars should not be so easily transported into the church worship service because marketing and selling are deciding factors in how this music created. It is much better to create music within the church community, for the church community, under the authority of the church elders who strive to protect truth.

As for my views on Christian pop singers, I'm not dead set against them. There are some that I like and listen to because their lyrics are biblical and Christ centered and I find I'm refreshed and encouraged by listening to them. But with the large majority, I find that their image and sound is really just a cheap imitation of a current secular pop star. Their music is often phony and affected, and full of bad theology. So I guess I do have a problem with the mass of Christian pop music used in mainstream evangelical churches.

I'm very thankful for the initiative of godly men and women recently who have labored to compose some quality contemporary music for the church. Some examples would be Bob Kauflin, Marc Heinrich, Abraham Piper , D.A. Carson, Stuart Townend and many others.

Luther stealing bar songs?

2005-11-19T15:39:00.000-08:00

I was recently reading Leonard Payton's article, Congregational singing and the Ministry of the Word. I have to admit, it was one of the most interesting and thought provoking articles I've read on worship. Payton certainly has some valuable thoughts on worship issues that modern worship commentators seem to have largely neglected.

At one point he discusses the appropriateness of certain styles of music for worship. He does not feel that music from pop culture is appropriate, but advocates music from folk culture and high culture.

I had to laugh as he commented on the objection he often receives for his rejection of pop culture in the worship service. How often have we all heard that Luther stole his tunes from bar songs. Payton says:

As soon as I say this, someone will retort, "But Luther used songs from the bar." This is a regrettable misconception widely popularized in our time. Similarly, some will triumphantly respond with that famous Luther quotation: "Why should the Devil have all the good tunes?" Anyone who has read Luther extensively knows that when Luther spoke of the Devil, he usually meant the papacy. In truth, when Luther asked, "Why should the Devil have all the good tunes?" he did not mean, "Why should the good tunes remain out there in the bar when we could use them in church?" Rather, he meant the Reformation church should not leave all the fine old hymns to the Roman Catholic Church. He was making a passionate plea for the use of traditional music!

As for Luther borrowing tunes from the bar, this is a misunderstanding of both music theory and music history. The "bar form" is a label for a musical/architectural form, not a description of musical activity occurring in a public place of alcoholic consumption. In Luther's time, there were academic societies called Meistersingers. They existed for the purpose of composing songs based usually on biblical texts, and the musical form they used was called a "bar form." The bar form is like a fixed recipe. It has as much to do with consuming alcoholic beverages in a pub lic place as does "bar oil" for a chain saw, attorneys "passing the bar," or Jewish boys and their "Bar Mitzvahs."

It is true that melodies from the inn could occasionally migrate into the church in Luther's time. However, it is equally true that melodies from the church could wend their ways into the inn. This is not the case in our time for the simple reason that the inn of Luther's time does not correspond to the bar of our time. The Reformation in England began in an inn. It was a place of spirited discussion and thought. It was a communal place in the best sense...Finally, musicological research since 1923 has leaned more and more in favor of Luther as the composer of his own melodies, though Luther certainly had no scruples with inns as ample historical evidence indicates. They were places to look for good beer, not good music.

It is hard to take seriously a Christian pop singer who sings "I Stand in Awe of You" with questionable Britney Spears-ish guttural sounds after every second word. Even if Luther did transcribe a popular tune or two into worship songs, I'm sure this was not the desired effect he had in mind.

Data-Stream Worship?

2005-11-17T19:43:00.000-08:00

Lately I've been enjoying this worship blog by Marc Heinrich, further up & further in music. He links to a variety of other interesting blog posts on music and worship. I found particularly interesting this one on "data- stream worship". Apparently, it's being argued that hymns are not relevant anymore because they only "recite data about God," and today's generation wants to skip the "doctrinal Cliff Notes" and talk directly to God.

A Wife's Submission

2005-11-12T06:37:00.000-08:00

Ephesians 5 says,

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior...each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

No wife likes to hear the 'S' word, but what exactly does it mean to submit? And what does "respect" for our husband look like? I think one of the best ways to show respect for our husband is to submit to him.

Submitting to our husband is not mindless obedience, I believe it is actively supporting him in the leadership responsibility God has given him. This means we are not competing with him for leadership, but rather, building him up and supporting him in the decisions he makes. We, as women, often become so self-absorbed that we worry excessively about whether our rights are being infringed upon to the neglect of our own husband's well being. Shouldn't we instead be desiring our husband to excel in his leadership? Seeing the one we love most in this world find joy and contentment in what God has created him to be, is one of the greatest joys a wife can have.

In contrast, a woman who criticizes her husband, and who picks apart every decision he makes, does tremendous damage to her husband and consequently to her marriage. I think it is very important for men to feel that their wife really trusts them, and that she believes him to be competent, capable and worthy of respect. Sometimes it can be difficult for us to let go of control and trust our husband with our well being, but ultimately, it comes down to trusting God. If our husband is a believer, we can entrust him to God, and trust that He will continue to sanctify him and guide him in his decision making.

But what if our husband is sinning? Obviously, there is a time to confront, but even this can be done with humility and kindness. I love this example of Winston Churchill being confronted by his wife, Clementine, that I came across in Sharon James' book, God's Design for Women. It's an excerpt from a letter found in Speaking for Themselves: The Personal Letters of Winston and Clementine Churchill. The manner of Clementine's rebuke is so loving and respectful that you know she is doing it wholly because she cares about his well being. She says:

I hope you will forgive me if I tell you something that I feel you ought to know. One of the men in your entourage - a devoted friend - has been to me & told me that there is a danger of your being generally disliked by your colleagues and subordinates because of your rough sarcastic and overbearing manner...I was astonished and upset because in all these years I have been accustomed to all those who have worked with & under you, loving you - I said this, & I was told 'No doubt it's the strain.' My darling Winston - I must confess that I have noticed a deterioration in your manner & you are not so kind as you used to be...with this terrific power [as Prime Minister] you must combine urbanity, kindness and if possible Olympic calm...Besides you won't get the best results by irascibility and rudeness...Please forgive your loving devoted and watchful - Clemmie.

"Let a Woman Learn in Silence"

2005-11-07T17:49:00.000-08:00

I had no idea how many differing view points there could be on one verse...until looking into this passage (1 Tim 2:11). Most of the older theologians say things that are totally shocking to my modern sensibilities, and many of the modern commentators are so PC that I don't really trust them. Judging from the wide variety of views, it seems that even godly, solid men can be influenced by the presuppositions of their culture in regards to women.

One of the most useful (and accessible) books I found on the topic was Women in the Church, edited by Kostenberger, Schreiner and Baldwin.

In this book Daniel Doriani writes an article entitled A History of the Interpretation of 1 Timothy 2 where he notes among others, Jonathan Edwards' view. This drew my attention immediately because Edwards is a theologian that I've really grown to admire. It seems to me that he has something to say on the topic that transcends his culture.

Doriani says:

Edwards discussed the women's issue in the context of spiritual pride in the New England revival. Citing 1 Timothy 2:9-12, Edwards says all persons owe each other a civil reverence, including a "modesty and shamefacedness," which social "inferiors," owe their "superiors," in both civil and spiritual realms. "Not that...women's mouths should be shut up from Christian conversation," Edwards quickly adds. But there is room for women to be reverent toward men, says Edwards.

Doriani then quotes Edwards as saying:

"Tis beautiful for persons when they are at prayer...to make God only their fear...and to be wholly forgetful that men are present...And tis beautiful for a minister, when he speaks in the name of the Lord of hosts...to put off all fear of men. And tis beautiful for private Christians, though they are women and children to be bold in professing the faith of Christ...and in owning God's hand in the work of his power and grace, without any fear of men, though they be reproached as fools and madmen...But for private Christians, women and others, to instruct, rebuke, and exhort, with a like sort of boldness as becomes a minister when preaching, is not beautiful."

Thoughts on Self-righteousness

2005-11-05T10:30:00.000-08:00

In our North American society there are endless unwritten rules that are seen as virtues. If you follow them you are applauded as the 'enlightened' of society. These rules may include the following:

"Be assertive,"
"Look out for number one,"
"Climb the corporate ladder,"
"Be 'tolerant',"
"Recycle,"
"Donate to charities,"
"Be youthful and beautiful,"
"Save the trees,"
"Support women who kill inconvenient babies,"
"Don't regret anything," etc.

In this environment it can be incredibly easy to get caught up in self-righteousness, while caring very little about offending a holy God.

While reading Calvin on 1 Tim. 4:1-5, I came across this passage in his commentary:

Men being by nature inclined to hypocrisy, Satan easily persuades them that God is worshipped aright by ceremonies and outward discipline; and, indeed, without a teacher, almost all have this conviction deeply rooted in their hearts. Next is added the craftiness of Satan to confirm the error: the consequence is, that, in all ages, there have been impostors, who recommended false worship, by which true godliness was buried. Again, this plague produces another, namely, that, in matters indifferent, men are laid under restraint; for the world easily permits itself to be hindered from doing that which God had declared to be lawful, in order that they may have it in their power to transgress with impunity the laws of God.

As hypocrites by nature, Satan easily persuades us that outward discipline is proper worship to God. Often we feel under restraint and full of guilt in matters that should be indifferent to Christians. True godliness can easily become buried resulting in the worst "plague," namely a self-righteousness that feels free to transgress the true laws of God.

While the misplaced restraints and hypocrisy of our society may be glaringly obvious to some, the same in our own lives may not be so easy to recognize. Self-righteousness is a subtle thing.
How often do we feel like God is more pleased with us when we do good works, or like He is far from us when we have not kept up on our 'Christian duties?' How often are we filled with anxiety as if the whole weight of the world was on our shoulders?

Many of us profess that we are saved by Christ alone, and yet feel the need to do certain things to feel saved, or maybe we feel saved but do certain things to feel more sanctified than others. I am not advocating lazy Christians who have no fruit in their lives. But what I am advocating is a change of focus from ourselves and what we are doing, to Christ and what He has done.

This seems very simple, but the full realization of our great salvation is profound. If we are Christ's, there is no more striving to be good enough. Our souls rest in the goodness of God, our hearts are overjoyed at the thought that we "who once were far off have now been brought near by the blood of Christ," our minds are at peace with full assurance as we serve God today because there is nothing to prove and nothing to lose. If Christ is ours, then we are His, and nothing can separate us from the love of God. (Rom. 8:38-39).

This is Getting Ridiculous

2005-10-31T07:45:00.000-08:00

There have been more than a few times that my husband and I have left the house together only to realize that we were wearing almost identical outfits. (Clint, I apologize ahead of time for using the word 'outfit' in reference to you.) As if that's not bad enough, we have now started to write blog posts on the same topics (only he's faster at getting them up and a much better writer than I am.) First it was the posts on wisdom living, and now, I have written something on self-righteousness, only to find that his most recent post was on comparative righteousness. So I refuse to post it until he moves on to a new topic.

Love, Marriage, and Then What?

2005-10-26T20:05:00.000-07:00

This scene comes from one of my favorite movies, The Quiet Man. The leading man and lady fall madly in love, but then have more than a few issues to work out after the marriage. Thoughtful consideration of how we, as women, can serve the Lord best in marriage is essential if we desire to avoid the tension displayed in this picture.

So what is our active role in marriage? It is often said that our role in marriage is to submit, but while submission is a vital part of the marriage dynamic, I do not believe it accurately encompasses the whole of what the bible teaches on the role of a wife. Sharon James in her book, God's Design For Women, comments on the wide sphere of activity pursued by the well-known Proverbs 31 wife:

It would be silly to say that her role was to submit. Her primary calling was to love and nurture her husband and children, but she also had a wide sphere of benevolent and economic influence. We see that she gladly affirmed her husband as leader in the family and community, in that she took the burden of managing the household and estate so that he could play his part as a community leader ('at the gate'). So you could say rather that her response to her husband was one of submission (saying 'yes' to his leadership).

We know that the bible clearly teaches the importance of submitting to our husband and affirming his leadership, but it seems more accurate to say our primary role in marriage is to help our husband. And I believe there is much more satisfaction and fulfillment in doing this than Christian women are generally led to believe.

We read in Genesis 2:18, "The Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." A 'helper' is not a degrading role. Men actually need our help (just as we need their leadership.) We are to be a companion to them, to help and strengthen them. The Proverbs 31 woman "brings [her husband] good, not harm," and he "has full confidence in her." (vv.11-12) It's interesting to note that this woman does pursue business and activities that are outside of the home, but everything she does 'helps' and works toward the good of her husband, children and household.

One of the best ways we can help our husband is to take care of the details of running the household in order to free him up to pursue his calling and ministry. An example of marriage that I find inspiring is that of Jonathan Edwards (an 18th century pastor and theologian) and his wife Sarah. When reading about her, I am always struck by how she does everything she can to promote her husband's usefulness and happiness. Apparently, she took care of their property and gave the hired man instructions for the day. Elizabeth Dodds in her book entitled Marriage to a Difficult Man, the "Uncommon Union" of Jonathan and Sarah Edwards says, "They used to tell in Northampton [their home town] how once Edwards asked, 'Isn't it about time the hay was cut?' To which Sarah mildly replied, 'It's been in the barn for two weeks.'"

One thing I'm learning is that we cannot expect recognition for all our work in the home because our efforts often go unseen and unappreciated in the moment. But there can be great satisfaction in knowing God's pleasure in our obedience, and in knowing that we are fulfilling God's calling in a way that has lasting value. This is what we need to remember when the world tells us that what we are doing is irrelevant and unimportant.

Some Thoughts on Wisdom Living

2005-10-24T21:22:00.000-07:00

What is wisdom living? My favorite cowboy says in his post here, "Wisdom is concerned with the art of living skillfully before God within the covenantal relationship with Him, and by consequence, with the world."

It seems that Christians have largely neglected the art of "living skillfully" as revealed in scripture, and consequently, are easily influenced by the current views of the culture in their lifestyle. Perhaps some view the physical or practical matters of life as being opposed to spiritual life. Cultivating wise living here on earth and "seeking a better homeland"(Heb. 11:14) may seem like mutually exclusive concepts, but closer study shows that these two biblical ideas are in perfect unity. According to the cowboy, "The fact that an entire genre of biblical literature is devoted to Wisdom should alert pastors to the importance of such teaching." So why do we not devote more thought to this subject?

Exemplified for us in the wisdom literature is balanced and quality living. There is the exhortation to work hard, but also to enjoy the fruit of those labors; to eat and drink, but avoid gluttony; to celebrate sex, but flee adultery; to pursue study and books, but not excessively; to build great things, but not love money. There is instruction for every aspect of living well.

One thing we must be wary of as we pursue wisdom living is becoming overly attached to the blessings of living well. As Job says after all his property and family are destroyed, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD. We must not be presumptuous in the Lord's blessings to us. We do not have a right to them, they are not owed to us. Loving good things as an end in themselves is not good enough, they must draw our thoughts to God, and cause us to meditate on His beauty.

French Women Don't Get Fat?

2005-10-21T19:35:00.000-07:00

In a culture where physical beauty is the greatest virtue, where a woman’s worth is evaluated by how she looks, where everywhere we look there are images of stick-thin women exalted as the ideal, how ironic is it that so many women are overweight. Most women devote their lives to diet and exercise, but find no long-term success. Constant dissatisfaction and unhealthy obsession is the result. If we are honest, this sad state of affairs affects our lives more than we care to admit.

Obesity seems to be largely a North American problem. Why is this I wonder? As my husband and I browsed through Indigo earlier today, I came across a book by Mireille Guiliano called French Women Don't Get Fat. Although she does not write from a Christian perspective, I resonated with some of her thoughts about having a balanced relationship to food and life. Her observations of French and American women are telling:

At the outset, let's state that French women simply do not suffer the terror of kilos that afflicts so many of their American sisters. All the chatter about diets I hear at cocktail parties in America would make any French woman cringe. In France, we don't talk about "diets," certainly not with strangers. We may eventually share a trick of two we've learned with a very close friend--some cunning refinement of an old French principle. But mainly we spend our social time talking about what we enjoy: feelings, family, hobbies, philosophy, politics, culture, and, yes, food, especially food (but never diets)...French women don't skip meals or substitute slimming shakes for them. they have two or three courses at lunch and then another three (sometimes four) at dinner.

It is interesting and almost surprising to hear of the gulf between the French and American attitude toward food and life. Why are Christian women so shaped by the warped strivings of our culture? I venture to say it is because we have not spent enough time meditating on wisdom living as laid out for us in the bible. More on this later.

2005-10-21T06:22:00.000-07:00

Ada Sari, a famous coloratura soprano of the early 20th century.

A Wife's Struggle for Identity in the 21st Century

2005-10-20T12:53:00.000-07:00

I think we are all aware that God’s idea of marriage is very politically incorrect. And that in striving to fulfill what He has uniquely designed and equipped females for, we will be going expressly "against the grain." The influence of feminism in our culture makes it very difficult for a woman to enjoy contentment in marriage. The feminist agenda is so far reaching that its effects are felt even within our churches, and although strictly speaking our own sinful nature is that root of discontentment, feminism stirs it up, and acts as a stumbling block for many women today. One of my favorite authors, Sharon James, writes, "By now, the idea that a woman may find her chief role in life as a wife and a mother has been discredited beyond repair." A woman whose energies are primarily devoted to a domestic sphere is seen in a degrading light. Many women feel that if they are not pursuing a successful career as their primary goal, they are somehow second-class citizens. The difficulty that arises for many women is an identity question, "Who am I, if not defined by my career?" and "What is my worth?" As women living in the 21st century, we need to have a solid grasp on what it means to be in Christ. If our sense of self-worth comes from what we do, we will constantly be struggling with insecurity and discontentment. But we have a higher calling than what the world would have for us. Our worth can only be realized in light of the greatness and majesty of our God who has counted us worthy, based on the blood of Jesus Christ. We have the privilege of serving the One we love most in the role that he has purposefully and thoughtfully designed us for. We need to fight to keep worldly ideas from stealing our joy.

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." (Rom. 12:2)